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Air Out My Shorts

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Language: English
Category: Comedy / Comedy
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Join podshow hosts Preston Buttons & The Word Whore as they clumsily narrate their way through submitted works of Short Fiction: often painfully, always absent-mindedly and completely unincumbered by any relevent credentials... �If you are looking for a serious (even �pseudo� intellectual) literary discussion, you'll just have to keep right on looking...� Join podshow hosts Preston Buttons & The Word Whore as they clumsily narrate their way through submitted works of Short Fiction: often painfully, always absent-mindedly and completely unincumbered by any relevent credentials... �If you are looking for a serious (even �pseudo� intellectual) literary discussion, you'll just have to keep right on looking...� Join podshow hosts Preston Buttons and The Word Whore as they clumsily narrate their way through submitted works of Short Fiction: often painfully, always absent-mindedly and completely unincumbered by any relevent credentials...

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105 :: Shiver Me Livers

Preston wins another wet T-shirt contest. Clooney misses his true calling, once more, but sometimes that's just how the cooch curdles. Having failed to check expiration dates, Doctor Wood spoils a perfectly good "Sunday Afternoon". Bartender Matt helps The Whore pick out a new pillow....

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[ Tue, 23 Sep 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

104 :: Tickle-Me Alamo

Preston's car-bombing license is revoked due to Alzheimer's. The Word Whore voluntarily enters a facility for the treatment of sex addiction. Sanchez sacrifices eternal life to appease the furry masses and Banachek drowns in a sea of virgin cougars....

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[ Thu, 11 Sep 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

103 :: Catcher In The Eye

Mike Dominic floods the AoMS studios after studying horny hamsters, but that's another story. Dreamy Dean reinvents the rock 'n' roll death. Best Boy Electric, You Know Bernie You Know Bernstein, can't get a grip on his gaffer....

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[ Thu, 14 Aug 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

102 :: Nice Melons

Buttons sniffs out the homeless. Josh (The Listener) totally gives away "The End of The Movie". The Word Whore riffles through Tarantino's wank-o-dex with her bare toes. 191 Randall Crescent has to ferment the fruit before planting his seed, but he'll happily share the sloppy seconds....

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[ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

101 :: Same Show, Different Pile

AoMS rolls around in the warm squelchy aftermath of their much celebretated 100th. The Whore edits lamb screams from her Moussaka. A big fat Greek conflict prevents Preston from a life of piracy. John Doer doesn't know her, but he does dabble in dwarf tossing....

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[ Tue, 08 Jul 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

100 :: Tastes Like Chicken

Just-a-Joe helps AoMS drag its sorry lagging arse into year 3 -- w000t! Drunk with power, The Whore blows another mic. Ernst and Young count Buttons offspring before they hatch. Chad Hanson spreads his ash, as Jim Henson rolls over in his grave. Be careful where you dip your quarter-chicken, Canada is a nice clean place....

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[ Wed, 25 Jun 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

99 :: Vertical Smile

The Word Whore takes a vow of silence. I Am Webster flashes his jugs. Dreamy Dean manages to conceal his privates, even while rolling off the rock, but Buttons brazenly unclasps his semi-wooden cloister....

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[ Fri, 30 May 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

98 :: Age of Consent

Buttons enjoys himself. The Whore gets stupider. William Grant Preston does "The Deed" in a dark park with Marky Mark and Slutty McSlutSlut drops the soap....

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[ Fri, 11 Apr 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

97 :: Saccharinly So

Afternoon regurgitation turns Buttons green with envy. Joseph J Jolton polishes a petrified piece of Victorian feces. The Word Whore exhumes a canine corpse. Edible big bully King Minos Del Toro rallies a rabble regime, but it's all Greek to AoMS....

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[ Mon, 31 Mar 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

96 :: Less Thin Lizzy

Buttons masters the telephone. Void Munashii squeezes into his ess-less unitard to fend off Gap-happy zombies in "Mallville". The Word Whore advocates tough love for self-loathing snipers. Disco Lou goes down all day long, even after his wing-man falls flat. They paved paradise and put up Mississauga....

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[ Wed, 28 Feb 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

95 :: My Little Pelt

The new Pauly B action figure comes with its own cancer-causing comb-over cream-rinse. Lord Felton Pole reveals the secret to a successful marriage. 88 Fingers Willy flounders under parental lock down. The Whore helps vain elephants turn a lighter shade of grey and Buttons finds religion....

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[ Sun, 24 Feb 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

94 :: Gizzy Tissue

The Whore is chronologically challenged. Fish shares his meat treat with Colonel Chicken Diddler, while Buttons suffers a stroke. Banacek rolls back from Sin City without his hand-cannon. What happens in The Gun Store, should probably stay in The Gun Store. ...

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[ Wed, 30 Jan 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

93 :: YITCH

AOMS inspires the first scratch-n-sniff Farmer's Almanac. Winter rips Buttons a new one. Bill Clinton leaves an indelible mark on the lesbian community. Maqx gets mad enough to make "Mel" sing soprano. 191 Randall goes for the jugular and The Word Whore finds decapitated roosters a little tough to swallow....

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[ Sun, 20 Jan 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

92 :: Cheese Wii

1998, the unofficial year of the hedgehog, rolls out with a rodent-infested fable by S.J. Marky and astill-un-beta-tested MacDaddy GMG debut. Preston goes back to school to learn to party like a pope. The Whore's alpha tail theory is full of gassy bacterial holes and the land down under becomes a safe haven for pie-dodging Irish possums....

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[ Tue, 15 Jan 2008 07:00:00 -0500 ]

91 :: Kiss Kiss Bag Bag

Buttons sheds a short and curly. The Word Whore is googley peeved. Preston Buttons Jr tops it off with some royally spoofed special sauce. Dreamy Dean hangs, so the hotline (305-76-SHOWS) gets a long overdue D 'n' C....

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[ Tue, 18 Dec 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

90 :: Diamond Logs

This ain't AoMS. This is genocide. As they pulled Mary Kate out of the oxygen tent, Electric Lee asked for the latest party. In Wyeth's clever bunk, "How To" profit-dump, smart like The Whore he was. Preston Buttons freak he was. So pick through that bowl on your hands and knees. The diamond logs are shredders and they hide inside feces....

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[ Thu, 29 Nov 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

89 :: Buffing The Pumpkin

Preston Buttons and The Word Whore serve up two heaping helpings of Purple Puddle Nut Pie. Jack Black gets no slack. Buttons has no seeds. The Whore pimps out the two of them. Happy Halloween. This is not the best episode in the world. It's a tribute. ...

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[ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

88 :: Moistened and Mashed

Rock 'n' roll is complicated. Escape Pod's Steve Eley spews all over the Expo. Buttons bakes a Hell's Angels Food Cake. In the Navy, DocZim can check out your disease. In the Navy, yes, you can contract STDs. The Whore begs for mercy....

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[ Mon, 15 Oct 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

87 :: Better Than Dirk

The Whore lets Preston hitch his insignificant wagon to her crap-purveying star. Young Bulls guard family jewels from dear old Dad. "Demon Hunter", by Dan Manning, is much better than dirt. Buttons shops in The Underworld because redheads prefer brown, but Scott (TTN) won't wear satin to ward off Pauly B 's pond-crossing beer fingers....

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[ Sun, 16 Sep 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

86 :: Eat The Rich

Kevin Smith threatens to foul up Festivas Tet!Anus. Shane Passon and Amy Mann lure exploratory foragers down their crumb-laden treasure trails in "The Colony". Strapping on Super-slider Snow Skates and setting his sights on Aspen, Angry Phone Guy tears yet another sparkly strip off the well-to-do....

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[ Mon, 03 Sep 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

85 :: Jimmy Hats

Preston pees on the competition. The Whore staggers back to her roots. Mark Duhe's "Reclamation" runs Native American gymnasts and contorted eunuchs out of Kansas. Dreamy Dean gets a grip on his inner fluffer, prompting Link to run away and join the circus...

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[ Mon, 27 Aug 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

84 :: Neutral Peelers

Much to Preston's audible dismay, Shaggy Fancy Pants staggers by the AoMS studio to get boozed and bring sexy back. The Word Whore adds a large dose of frankness to her 'to do' list. "Broken Angels" - a FISH story of figurines loved and lost – gets much more lost than loved, in this beer-soaked trainwreck from the cutting room floor....

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[ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

83 :: Cuba Libre

Preston paints Pottahawk pink. The Word Whore liberates Bula Bula Bada. Buttons performs ritualistic circumcision on Phil Foster's "Cuban Smokes" and - after riding a wave in the wake of an old Sedan - a busload of octogenarians guide Earl The Pearl through the Kama Sutra....

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[ Thu, 19 Jul 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

83 :: Cuba Libre

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[ Thu, 19 Jul 2007 07:00:00 -0500 ]

82 :: Match Game

ZZ Top cancels Brazilian tour to save face. Toronto men renounce routine foot care. Just-a-Joe goes way "Over The Edge". Trapper's Better Half keeps his meat clean. Buttons just found a brand new box of matches and what he knows The Whore ain't had time to learn....

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[ Mon, 25 Jun 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

82 :: Match Game

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[ Mon, 25 Jun 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

81 :: Smoke Monger

Buttons bends over backwards to pay his rent. The Whore gets wrapped up in wordy nudistism. A full year past all expectation, the ink finally dries on Kennah's "Final Draft". Inept call-screener, 88 Fingers Willy, fishes for pearls and farms out his lucky prostate....

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[ Thu, 14 Jun 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

81 :: Smoke Monger

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[ Thu, 14 Jun 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

80 :: 10 Slot Colostomy Bag

Addiction lands The Whore an on-call Priest. Buttons gets taken out by a swinging boob. Batman isn't supposed to be beautiful, Mike Dominic gives his roommate some static, and Angry Phone Guy picks out just the right bag to go with his stain-resistant frock...for the Prom....

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[ Mon, 28 May 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

80 :: 10 Slot Colostomy Bag

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[ Mon, 28 May 2007 08:00:00 -0500 ]

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